Change is good: Wear Pink!

“Wear pink!”  Those were my friend's last words of advice as I said goodbye to move across the country.  

My, how things can change in life!!!  A few years ago I wouldn’t have been caught dead in pink; today I’m riding the subway in a pink satin shirt with my pink computer bag.  Yesterday I was a California girl with a view of the Pacific Ocean and an old Bronco; today I’m riding the subway in New York City on my way to work.  Holy moley, life is full of unexpected twists and turns.

Does change change us?  I mean at our core...  Do we abandon ourselves when we seek something different in life?  Is this city girl in pink satin the same as the rough and tumbly, dirt-road driving, cargo-pant wearing, nature lover?  

While there is huge danger in changing for someone else, or pretending to be someone we are not, change can also mean growth.  Absolutely, this pink-wearing girl is the same person who was adamantly opposed to the color!  In fact, I think I am more fully myself as a result of embracing pink, and packing up my life to move across the country!!!  ...because I am learning to not be afraid of all of the parts of myself.  I am learning that there is freedom in releasing ourselves from the "supposed to's" and stereotypes and labels that we weigh ourselves down with.  I am learning that adventure and exploration can be bigger than a dirt road.

So I challenge you to look closely at your life.  I'm sure it is full of loveliness!  But see if there is something that you would like to change but have been nervous about, and take the leap, or the little hop!

This is still a story about a girl...a story about life, love, adventure and the journeys through the shoe department.  Things are just a little different now: for awhile she'll be traipsing through the concrete jungle instead of the rainforest or Arctic, hunting vintage deals, amazing food, fabulous photo opportunities, and men in SUITS.  Put on something pink and come along for the ride...

One Per Week

So I decided to challenge myself to average one date per week for 2009. That's 52 dates in the year. No problem! Fifty two is not that large of a number...

I was forced into an early retirement mid summer. Turns out 52 is a lot! I maintained my average, but was exhausted! However, it was fun! I ate really well and had some great stories to share at Taco Tuesday! :)

One of the ways I upped my average at one point was to go speed dating. Yes, it really exists! I have had two speed dating experiences so far, one which was part of this year's challenge. For those of you blissfully out of the dating pool, speed dating involves a room full of proclaimed singles which are paired up at random. They have a "date" that lasts about six minutes and then a bell rings and all the men rotate. The result is 10 dates in one evening! No need to pick out the perfect outfit for each one. No time to obsess about where to meet or who is going to pay. You don't even have time to get nervous! And if it goes poorly, it will be over very soon without any excuse about your friend's dead cat needed to allow you to escape.

The first speed dating experience I had felt like being in a movie. I effectively went out with the whole spectrum of men in one evening. There was the multiple divorcee, the man whose mother lived with him six months of the year and left him individually packaged frozen meals to get him through the remaining months, the man who kept touching my hand, the man who did not speak the entire time except to make odd comments about my clothes (six minutes can be reeeeeeeaaaaaalllllllly long!), you get the picture. Having gone into it with an attitude of simply being entertained by the experience, the evening was quite fun. I laughed a lot and met some interesting men. My second speedy evening had a very different feel. The room felt heavy with disappointment, almost sadness. I almost wanted to flee before my sparkle was snuffed out.

Where does that sadness among single people come from? I went out with some fantastic men this year, men with great jobs and interesting hobbies...full lives. Yet there is this pervasive belief that many have in a need to find that one person that "completes" you. Wow. That is a lot of pressure! No thank you. Does that mean that single people are incomplete??? I don't think so. I would love to find a person that I could balance out, compliment, inspire to be their best self, and vice versa, but COMPLETE THEM??? No way!

I was rockin' out to Alanis Morissettes' 21 Things I Want In a Lover today. What a great song! I know, I know...you associate Alanis with bitterness and angst... But listen to the words. Or look them up online if you don't like her music. I'll give you a little taste because there is some profound wisdom there. And I'll ask you: what are your 21 things? And if you are not single, what are 21 things you love about your partner? Maybe you should tell them...

Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds?
Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition?
Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know that it alone does not equate wisdom?

Do you derive joy from diving in and seeing that loving someone can actually feel like freedom? Are you funny a la self-deprecating, like adventure, and have many formed opinions?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer
I figure I can describe it since I have a choice in the matter
These are 21 things I choose to choose in a lover

I'm in no hurry; I could wait forever
I'm in no rush cause I like being solo
There are no worries and certainly no pressure

In the meantime I'll live like there's no tomorrow...

Been There, Done That!

So, do you have a Bucket List?  I do. Like most, after the movie of the same name came out, I made a list of things that I want to do before I kick the bucket.  My list includes the usual...places to visit, adrenalin adventures, life goals.  But as I made the list, I began to think of things that I have already experienced, and I decided to start writing them down.  My "Been There, Done That" list ended up being much longer than the Bucket List!  Now, it's not necessarily a list of goals accomplished, but of things that may be great stories for my grandkids one day.  And I've found that often as I check something off my Bucket List, I add a couple of things to the Done That list.  How fun!  It's been a great way to focus on the joys that life brings.  So try it!  Write down some of the things that make your life story uniquely yours.  And keep adding...think of the stories...

Here's mine: 

Check!!!

• Palmyra
  
• Danced on a flat bed truck under the stars
  
• Crossed the Line, Dateline, Pacific
  
• Learned to dive
  
• Learned to surf
  
• Kissed whales & looked into their eyes
  
• Flashed the Coasties as they flew above me in their chopper
• Swam with an oarfish
  
• Pet a manatee, dolphin, penguin
  
• Assisted in surgeries in Africa
  
• Drove the Bronco on two wheels
  
• Released sea turtles, one named after me
  
• Won a pull-up contest with all the crew of a tallship where I  volunteered, but let the Captain win by 1 for the sake of his ego
  
• Volunteered with NOAA
  
• Hugged a baobab tree
  
• Took my mom on safari, to pet the whales, & to an island where clothing is optional
  
• Got a tattoo in Tahiti for crossing the line
  
• Hugged a NY firefighter
  
• Saw a leopard in the wild…went on safari, listened to lions from my tent, watched elephants bathe while I drank my morning coffee
  
• Was homeless & lived with an ocean view
• Put a message in a bottle in the ocean at the equator
  
• Salsa-ed with the locals
  
• Learned Spanish in Spain
  
• Saw the Eiffel Tower, Monet’s garden, the Running With the Bulls, Central Park, a rainforest, untouched coral, moon-rise on the water, bioluminescent dolphins, 
  
• Won a photo contest
  
• Put a roof on a house
  
• Cooked fry bread with a Navajo woman
  
• Belly danced around a fire under a nearly full moon to the music of live drums
  
• Saw the northern lights, from the entrance of my igloo where I slept
  
• Went dog sledding
  
• Saw a wolf in the wild
  
• Stood on the frozen ocean
  
• Was offered a job as a “carnie” to run an ice cream stand at the fair
  
• Won a dance contest w/ a young hot partner
  
• Rappelled down a water fall into a river in my dry suit after hiking through a slot canyon outrunning a thunder storm
  
• Met my father!

Dance it out!

Are you a Grey's Anatomy fan?  I am!  One of the things about the show that makes me smile is the way Meredith and Christina dance it out when they are stressed or upset.  I love it and have adopted it into my world.  Not only when I am stressed or upset, but when I just need a pick-me-up, or need to shake something off, or am feeling low on energy.  And it is great!  I highly recommend it!

Here are my top three songs to dance around the house to:

"In These Shoes"  by Kirsty MacColl

"Say Hey (I Love You)"  by Michael Franti & Spearhead

"Unravel"  by Lynn Miles

Happy dancing...

We Need the Night

We can't understand the day without experiencing the night.  We cannot know the depths of joy without feeling sorrow.  We can't have life without death.

Happy Day of the Dead!

My whole perspective on this holiday has changed after my time in Mexico.  In general, our culture views death as negative, but is that necessarily true?  It is part of the natural process...  One's view of death is typically dependent upon one's belief, or lack thereof, of an afterlife or God.  But no matter our belief system, can't we spend a day celebrating a life?  The Day of the Dead is not about the dead person, but an honoring and a remembering and a celebration of their life.  

So celebrate!  Celebrate the life of someone you loved!  AND celebrate the life of someone who you are blessed enough to still have in your life...

Chuck Yeager

Today I worked in an eye clinic with Chuck Yeager!  Of course, I didn't know it was him until later.  Oh well.

For the past two days we ran a free clinic in the loca

l school for the children and anyone else from the colonia who showed up.  We posted a sign on the fence of the school and waited to see who would show up.  Over the two days, 100 people came for eye tests, not including the students in the school.  It was basic vision testing and we gave out free reading glasses.  For those who had more serious eye problems, a referral was written out to send them to the free clinic in the center of town run by the Lions Club.  

Today I photographed at that clinic, where Chuck was volunteering.  The Lions Club is only open one day per week for about two hours, but a local eye doctor volunteers his services during that time.  Patients can be tested for more serious vision problems and they will be provided with prescription glasses.  If they are under 18 or a student, the glasses are free.  Others are asked to make a donation.

Prior to testing the vision of the adults, however, the Lions test them for diabetes.  There is a 20% diabetes rate in the cities in Mexico!  Did you know the CocaCola here is higher in sugar?!?  Yep!  So, if they test positive for diabetes, they have to maintain a certain blood sugar level for a period of time before they will be given a prescription.  The percentage of diabetes in the rural areas of Mexico is less than five...hmmmm...

I spoke with the woman who is redesigning the website for the Lions Club Eye Clinic about sharing some of my photos with them.  What I wanted to know from her was what is the message the Lion's 

would like to tell with photos on their website.  She said:

"It's all about the children!"

Rover

"I'm a rover, can you love me anyway?"  -Great Big Sea

These trips nourish my soul.  They inspire me.  They make me want to continue to grow and learn and share.  Somehow, living in suburbia is like poking a pin sized hole in my soul and slowly, sometimes imperceptibly, life leaks out.  What happens?  It is a beautiful, no gorgeous, place.  I have incredible friends, a beautiful apartment, a good job, and lots of shoes (and places to wear them).  What happens?

Then I escape.  Escape is not the best word, but there it is.  I get on a plane, or a train, or a sailboat, or drive to a place that requires four wheel drive, and life returns.  Terrifying, heartbreaking, glorious life!  I meet people who cause me to think, or ask me to give without actually asking, or remind me that life is so much bigger than we ever imagined.  

But then I turn to share my latest epiphany or joy or fear with the person who shares my heart, and there is no one there.  

I'm a rover...can you love me anyway?   

That's a rhetorical question...